What I do is plug the monitors into the control room outs, they have they’re own volume and also a few switches to monitor any combo of main, alt 3-4, and tape sources. I run my audio interface into a stereo mixer channel and the main mixer outs go into the interface.
I keep the control room source on main so it’s basically mirroring the main outputs, but it has its own volume attenuator. This means I can crank a full healthy signal into the DAW from the mains with their attenuator at unity and control the monitor volume from the control room attenuator. I make sure in the DAW that the signal coming in from the mixer is not assigned to any interface outputs, or at least not any connected to the mixer as that would create a feedback loop. It’s just a “no output” track purely for recording.
So I have everything coming through the mixer mains being recorded in the DAW at a full level signal and I have a volume control for monitors… I use Alt 3-4 to OT, aux 1 to an analog delay, and aux 2 to the DAW for plugin fx…