I’ve got a five-week-old and I’m reading keenly, taking in the stories and experiences and advice… learning how to breathe. It seems like there’s zero time to make any music right now, let alone shower, but I have to fight the tunnel vision and believe things will get better on the music front soon enough! Negotiating this with my SO and making clear that I need at least 1 hour, 1 day a week of creative time to stay sane seems like one of the most important things I can do for self-care AND for my family’s interest. It’s just tough and I feel guilty for any selfish time at all when she’s breastfeeding around the clock and sleeping half as much as I am, and wishes she could work on her creative pursuits too.
Father of a nearly 4yo son: box 'em up. They are there later, but the first month of your baby fly and you should spend as much as you can with it.
Don’t worry, after the first three months or so you can start putting him/her to bed at a set hour, and if you’re lucky they’ll sleep for a while, which will give you a few hours every night.
And although this is a bit OT, I think people my age (in my 30’s) who are parents are fretting a bit over “spending time” with their kid. It’s like kids these days are supposed to get the attention of their parents at all times, which can’t be healthy either. We’ve probably given our son a bit too much attention during his first three years, and now have to teach him to play for himself, which he is finally able to do for a little while. I wouldn’t stress feeling like you have to spend time with your kid ALL THE TIME, it’s good to breathe too, for all parties involved.
Yea @jb, not alone of course!
I had put on one of my favourite Alpha Blondy records and we were dancing and having fun,… then a new song started and he reacted strongly on an intro (Masada) and wanted to hear the flute sound again and again, so I thought: it is time for his first sampling experience
Got the SP connected in the living room in no time, sampled the flute together with him, his eyes blinking and liking the whole thing of course. Then we sampled his percussion instruments, xylophone, his baby keyboard and my guitar, our voices … . Later my wife joined too (we needed someone who can actually sing, haha).
Great fun, family sampling for the win.
That’s amazing man. my kids the same age. He’ll hit pads but he still just wants to press every button regardless of what it does, makes it a bit hard to sit and do anything yet. Cant have him rip a knob off or something. Does yours talk yet?
Before our first child was born my partner and I discussed how important it was for us not to give up our hobbies or passions because of our children. We wanted to show our children how our hobbies helped make us happy, and we didn’t ever want to be in a situation where we blamed our kids for not doing what we loved. I am glad we made that choice, as some of my most precious memories combine music and family.
Making music late at night while I gave my son a bottle, recording holiday songs together as a family, my daughter’s fascination with my mixing board, my son and daughter jamming together in our studio space, my youngest daughter creating songs on my pocket operators, and my 2 year old strumming on her ukulele while she sang about toilet training are just a few of the memories that I hold dear to my heart.
Exposing children to music, and the joy of creating it, from a young age can be a wonderful way to bond with your children. So many fun ways to explore it as well. My kids still love banging on random household items while I follow them around with a mic for sampling, or helping me compose background music for family videos.
There will be times when you might have to sell some gear (I eventually had to sell most of the gear in my recording studio) but the desire to be musical and creative will hopefully stay strong and healthy, and will be something you can share with your family.
Talking yes, German and Greek are going strong, Dutch/Flemish a little less but that is on my account. I need to talk to him in my mother tongue more. We have this language rule my wife and I decided on:
. We live in Berlin: German is our family language
. Greek: my partner has Greek roots so she speaks Greek when they are alone or in Greek speaking company
.Dutch/Flemish: my roots, so I speak it with him when we are alone.
.English, starts in Kindergarten by the end of the year (bilingual schooling)
No worries, he is not forced this is all a natural process.
Greetings back … from an office near Alex
Wow, clever kid. Mines learning English and Spanish. Doesn’t really say anything except mama and dada with tons of babbling vocalisation. He’ll be ready when he’s ready sounds like he’s doing well. Good on ya
The boy is probably gonna slack soonish, we haven’t seen anything yet
I don’t want a smart kid. I will do my best to teach him self confidence, empathy, a little class and respect and … sampling of course
I am selling my last synth right now, my lovely Analog four mk2 (1000€)
Why? I think it is because making electronic music sucks my energy, eats my sleep and needs more focus than I have right now.
I have chosen to Have one ‘hobby’ only
It is juggling
Why? It gives energy, makes me feel fresh and sporty
Makes me tired So I can sleep at 11 Pm directly after coming home
It is like 3-0 for juggling, When playing against making electronic music
Maybe I will even sell my studio monitors (dynaudio bm12)
And maybe I will buy MPC live for hanging on the sofa and make some easy beats
But there is a big chance I will Just keep on playing guitar and piano now and then
Guitar, piano and a sampler, that’s more than enough to make some nice beats.
A lot of people put a lot of pressure on themselves as a hobby producer… because of the money and time invested. That’s no fun at all!
Guess you are solving the issue, juggling is great!
You’re halfway there by acknowledging her struggle and realizing what a precious resource time is. Complete the thought process and give her an hour or whatever you can - making that sacrifice will mean a lot to her. I know it meant a lot to me when my husband did it when we were in the same position. (And forcing me to take a break periodically even when I didn’t want to!)
It gets better, but blocking out the time for creative pursuits/hobbies will still be hard. Communicating, discussing and setting up a routine will only help both of you (and the baby!). My machines are still packed up or on loan for the most part, but even a few minutes here and there’s with a Volca can help scratch the itch.
All that being said, your baby won’t be a baby forever, so remember to enjoy it. Time will fly.
My son used to systemically take the knob caps off of the circuit and put then in his mouth every. single. time. he played with it.
Now he just likes turning it on and then making it go night night.
Are you raising yours bilingual? I’m fluent in Spanish and my husband is relying on his high school/college Spanish. We’ve got lots of words from him in both, but he’s only started to put the words together, sometimes mixing the two languages. “No, mama” being his most common phrase, of course.
“Just” piano and guitar? Would kill for the ability to play just one of those! Or an actual instrument (bedsides trumpet). Hang on to those skills and pass them on, along with the juggling!
Yeah bilingual, his mothers Venezuelan so Spanish is her first language. His thing at the moment is running into my studio and diving under my desk behind all the wires and I have to coax him out without toppling my monitors and dragging my boxes off the side. Barely any words yet. He copied me saying “tree” in the park and quacked at ducks earlier though
@wouzer ha that’s a cool hobby. I can’t juggle to save my life. If you stick with music making then sofa usage is definitely the MPC lives saving grace. Sofa jams with that thing are great
Im alive. I do my things. I also have to do another things. Sometimes I feel that I can’t do my things because of another my things. Also sometimes one thing is not related to another thing. I want to do all of this things. Or some things I don’t really want to do.