This setting is part of the pattern settings menu ([FUNC] + [PTN]) and is called “start silent”. It’s a per track setting and takes effect when you change to a pattern with a different part assigned to it.
If you want to change the global default you can do this in menu CONTROL->SEQUENCER (setting SILENCE TRACKS).
About your other problem: please try to explain it a little bit better. At the moment is just too confusing/unspecific to help you.