I write this post with a little bit of shame.
The last critic for my music has been from a coworker: “sorry, but I can listen your music more than 30 seconds”. It’s funny and sincere at least but ultimately I’ve seen how my friends, even friends that have a strong love for music, have ignored me totally.
Long time ago I realized that no one cares what we love, seriously. No one in my immediate circle, friends, parents, girlfriends… And I feel like I am spamming these people, and I hate it.
Yes, it’s possibly that my music is bad, very bad, even my girlfriend said to me yesterday “please, don’t share this music” and you know what? That music was the first time that I’ve sell something (sorry for the English). I’m a little bit sad and frustrated because I hate bother people with my things but even when the people you think you could love what you’ve made ignore you, it’s time to stop annoy people in my circle because they don’t understand my absolute passion (I need to do it for my mental health). So the only places where I can find people to talk are here or across the internet. No one cares about your passions. You can have a partner that supports you and wish the best for you but please without music heheh.
I don’t make that music to appeal people. Seriously, I make music for mental stability. I need to do it every day if I can, just a little bit but everyday.
Pretty much everybody that I know personally either doesn’t like my music or doesn’t even know I do it.
My wife is completely disinterested, despite being a talented musician herself, and really gets pissy if I dare to make music at all while she or the children are awake.
Fuck them though, what do they know…
Doesn’t stop me making music, doesn’t stop me sharing music. And most importantly, doesn’t stop me selling music.
Now admittedly, my niche is fucking tiny, but there’s enough weird fuckers out there in my niche to make it worthwhile. And when I say worthwhile I mean that in a more spiritual sort of sense, not financially. I deeply appreciate every sale I make on Bandcamp, but I’m not gonna make a living off it.
I mostly do what I do to avoid shooting myself in the face, it works for that purpose. But there are times when I doubt myself and worry about my tracks being shit and all that, but then I remember that, to most people, (more often than not including me) my tracks are shit, but to that one guy who pops a little like on it, or buys it, or even makes the effort to react at all, I touched one of the little bastards, and that’s a win in my book. That’s why I basically share every little thing I make with the world, good or bad, because that’s all part of the fun. Well it’s either that or some sort of exhibitionist narcissism on my part…
I have more fun doing it for myself in my 40s than I did doing it in my teens and 20s, when I tried to share my stuff more. I don’t have the deep musical talent to stand out from the oceans of other stuff that’s out there, so why should people really care. I’m ok with that.
Never try to please anyone else with your music, you will fail and you won’t be pleasing yourself, just make music you like to make and you will most likely find that some other people will like it, no matter how niche or weird it is. Put it out there without expectations is the best advice I can give.
The fact is that I don’t try to appeal to nobody. Never. I make the music what I’d like to hear with my limitations. That’s the problem, I guess they want to hear more standard things… But I can’t do it.
It’s time to stop bother people with my things. But the worst is when your musical friends that have a similar taste of you with electronic music ignore you. So, stop stop sending messages heheh
Then you are a “successful” artist already, expression without ego is the most valuable gift we can give ourself, for the reasons you and others have already stated.
I guess the issue is no one from your close circle cares about what you do musically, not that no one anywhere cares. And why do you care if they care? You shouldn’t need their validation.
After all, music is passion, you do it for yourself and you do it because you love doing it. Share things on soundcloud, youtube, bandcamp etc. If someone likes it, it’s a nice bonus, if not, who cares? Chill and make music anyway and have fun.
I’ve found no-one caring pretty freeing! I suppose it’s different if you want to make some sort of career out of it but otherwise as others have said do it for you. Don’t feel like you have to share to those close to you, that can line yourself up for bad feelings and they might just not ‘get it’ anyway.
Also in the same boat that it can be a good for the mental health thing… as long as it goes ‘well’ haha. Long periods not dabbling in music making makes me feel like I’ve lost a part of myself. Doing it for me is enough, and if anyone happens to enjoy it on the fairly rare occasiona I share then that’s a bonus, not the goal.
If I really cared what people thought, I’d likely just make cookie cutter nonsense to appeal to the most amount of people. A few folks like what I do and it’s slowly (slowly!) growing. Good enough for me. I do it largely for my mental health as well
Maybe reading The Creative Act by Rick Rubin can help you a bit. He talks a lot about the true reasons to make art, how to nurture it and so on. It’s a pretty good read
