Hi, new to the forums. For the record, you guys are super creative, intelligent, and (generally) friendly, so thanks for that.
What I wanted to talk about is giving up.
For the past 10 years or so, I’ve put my heart and soul into music making, in hopes of one day becoming a professional. I was in a band that did ok, opening for big acts, but that has since dissolved… I’m at this stage where I just want to throw in the towel. I’m constantly getting frustrated that my mixes are not up to par, overwhelmed by the amount of layers I have bouncing around everywhere, and just generally beating myself up about something that used to bring me joy. I’m afraid that I’ll never be happy, since I essentially created an identity as a musician and now I see that failing.
I’m stuck at a job that I dislike, and I’m on this halfhearted corporate career-path that I feel will only bring more misery.
Can you help a brother out and tell me not to give up? Or just say whatever you feel you would do in this situation.
no one else sees all the downtime and feelings of uselessness that we see in ourselves. it’s easy to project perfect lives onto people you only interact with online who seems to always be on top of things but far less easy to see that in our own lives.
i was recently struggling with wanting to give up but i just sat with that feeling for a while and decided that my life would be a lot less fun if making music wasn’t a part of it, even if no one wants to listen to what i make.
it’s OK to take a break. it’s OK to get someone else to mix your tracks. i know some people who do this and a lot of professionals do as well.
i wouldn’t rush into throwing in the towel. take some time and put it out of your mind and see how you feel later.
i know several people who take a break or get busy w/other things and don’t make music for a while. other hobbies that are healthy and lead to being outside or whatever… or learning a new skill etc.
don’t put so much pressure on yourself. mix dense tracks is hard. not everyone has the ears for it. it’s a skill that takes a long time to develop. i know people who mix stems based off rough mixes for clients. it’s really common.
This is tuff indeed. It’s easy to put all this pressure on yourself, I suppose in any aspect of your life. If music isn’t brining you joy, then I agree with taking a break, not sure I’d throw in the towel. The music industry is kind of fucked anyways, and becoming a professional has gotten even more difficult than it ever was. I’ve instead focused on the creation and completion of an art project that makes me happy, fuck what everyone else thinks. This allows me to finish and move on to the next thing, rinse and repeat.
As far as Corp job, I feel you there too. but we got to pay our bills, eat, buy drinks and most importantly, feed our GAS. Right?
Maybe its something else in your life that is making you unhappy. I’ve been in and out of therapy my whole life and had to go back a few years ago. I can say it always makes a positive difference and I am always, always happy that Ive never given up on my self.
Man I’ve been doing it on a everyday basis since 1996, starting on my brothers Atari. Produced for dope underground hip hop names like x clan, self jupiter of freestyle feelowship and project blowed rappers but never ever got any fame or cash (but like you all I guess, that’s never been the aim) and when I post stuff around here there’s barley any response even thou I consider this to be like the MOST cool community out there. I should probably have given up years ago mate but it’s like breathing and too much fun and too satisfying. Gotta keep on… and if you move one soul with your tunes kid it’s worth it, even if that person is you yourself. Push!
You are over thinking this. Simply if you remove comparing yourself to others from the equation you will suddenly find that everything is ok. And if you lack skills or mixes sound not well, here is an opportunity to learn it. I have been there (many of us were I would imagine) and believe me it is pointless. The mindset you have developed (or you have subconsciously acquired) is simply dragging you down.
I have no an advice, which will resolve your problem but I would suggest give yourself a rest with music making in the way you have been doing so far. Eg. if you were polishing off every bar ITB try to go crazy and record a live performance with hardware. Or vice versa. Change your routine. Try something new. Experiment . Don’t be afraid to be worse than the others (they were crap at some point too).
As someone here said: it is a journey.
On the job front… Oh well, it took me 15 years to find the right place. And I feel I was lucky.
I wholeheartedly wish you all the best and DO NOT GIVE UP.
I think here lies your main issue: maybe lower you expectations and…
… stop that. There’s nowhere to reach, nothing to achieve, we all lay down cold at the end of the journey. Maybe have a break, don’t try to become professional and sort out your other stuff like…
… this one. Step by step, i’d say manage this then see how you feel. You seem quite career-oriented and it doesn’t seem to fit you (anymore).
Quite funny how you seem so clear about what are your issues. I don’t think there’s such a thing as “a musician”. I play music for a living and people introduce me like that but i don’t. I do many other things, music is one of them. I can relate a lot with the frustration and for me it was linked with the strong desire to do only music. Since i allow myself to do other stuff, music has become a joy again, less pressure - more pleasure.
I’d advice the opposite than the latter: feel free to do something else as a main priority and maybe postpone music as a career or not… it doesn’t have to be labelled as giving up, just take a breathe
You can be a musician without music being your day job. If you’re unhappy at your day job, look for another. If you think you’d be unhappy doing any work that isn’t music, consider that your livelihood isn’t necessarily (and possibly shouldn’t be) the source of your identity or creative fulfillment. For most people, work is something you do to stay alive to support the more meaningful parts of your life. You don’t have to find something to “pour your heart and soul into”, just find something to do that you can tolerate, with people you get along with.
Hey @woops . I don’t want to go into detail about your job, but you’ve pointed out that you don’t like it. Maybe here is the problem, I used to have a job that I stopped liking at some point (for various reasons). All my frustration about not liking my job took an impact on my personal life and relationships. Changing my job completely changed my life, also in terms of creativity. Of course, I’m not saying you should quit your job, but you might want to take a look to see if that’s the root of your frustrations.
“Electronic” music was what got me into really loving music. My first taste of making anything was a free copy of EJay on a CD from a Max Power magazine in like 2000.
Skip a few years and I got a dodgy copy of fruity loops and a load of gabber samples. Ended up making a speedcore LP that looking back wasn’t even mixed
I loved Gabber for a time and I wanted to dabble in making it. Got me a Mac, copy of reason 3 and tried to replicate sounds and construct tracks. Honestly, the amount of layers, automation and little bits here and there was so stupidly overwhelming I ended up giving up myself. Wanted to make it pro and I just couldn’t do it to save my life. It felt so messy and complex. I didn’t make anything for a number of years and put it down for a while and concentrate on something else. Might be worth trying.
I have accepted it’s going to be a hobby of mine and I’m happy with that. If I make anything from it or could make a living wage by doing things then great, I’ll do it.
Don’t give up, don’t do what I did initially. What I have ended up doing is scaling down. People are becoming more simplistic, limiting themselves and becoming more minimal in a lot of aspects in their lives. I suppose because I listen to ambient, drone and sound art stuff it’s easy for me to say but I’ve changed as I’ve grown. I love working with less and knowing that I don’t need 8 layers of a synth sound to create a pad or drone or lead.
All in all mate just don’t give up. It’s quite clearly your passion and go so long it would suck to just throw it away because of your goal not panning out. Change the boundaries, alter the goal. It’s your goal at the end of the day and you can do what you want.
The forum is here, we all are and this place has helped me, it will help you too.
Be deliberately more minimal for a while. Limit yourself to less than 8 tracks. If you want to add another one, something else has to go. Your mixes will be better and also easier to achieve. Less is more. Try it for yourself! I had a period of solely listening to minimal techno. It really helped me.
We all expend so much angst, misery and depression. saddled with our specific plans, expectations of ourselves and aspirations. We set ourselves up to inevitably feel like we’ve failed. And then if we achieve what we thought we wanted, it isn’t as satisfying as we thought it would be, which is even more disappointing.
We are doing that, to ourselves!
So try to learn to live for the day, drink it in from wake up time until bed. Simply telling yourself you are enjoying it and lucky to be alive is surprisingly convincing. It is no more difficult that retreating into our preferred comfortable shell of loathing life.
Probably the main thing I’ve learned in recent years is everyone else is also a deep philosophical thinker.
I thought I was particularly deep, but I’m not - we are all in the same boat. Waiting for Godot perhaps, but let’s not waste it either by allowing mindgames to weigh us down. That is all they are.
