Will possibly get back to you on the story bit, but one thing I felt I should comment on:

I don’t think you have anything to lose. The part about you enjoying yourself is what matters! Maybe your mindset is a bit similar to those of former pro athletes – it’s hard to practice ‘casually’ after being close to the top, in your case, a record deal. But enjoyment is the best thing that can be gained from, well, just about anything, but especially hobbies :slight_smile:

I’m sure you know all of this, but I’ve been wrestling with the issue myself lately - not that I was ever anything when it comes to music.