Sleep

As a father of 2 young children (3&6y), having a full time job, being married, love juggling, hitch hiking, table football, guitar and electronic music, my problem is that a day only has 24 hours and a week only has 7 days.
I think my most unhealthy hobby is ‘making electronic music’. I love it, but it eats my sleep.
I make music when the kids sleep, from about 9pm. It activates me, no chance to go to bed at11.
So the I only sleep 6 hours a day, it is not enough for me.
I need to prepare to go to bed directly after my kids sleep. Reading, listening to Satie, nils Frahm or Chopin. Reading a book.

I thought this was about kids, but it’s not. It’s about wanting too much and about doing the right thing at the right moment. It is about preparing to sleep, it is about 8 hours sleep a night, it is about a healthy lifestyle.

I know how to live a healthy life, but my love of synthesizers and electronic and the way I make music with them doesn’t make me live that healthy life.

Anyone recognizes this problem?

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It is THE problem in life, and it’s really caused by our short lifespans. We wouldn’t be so frantic to fill each day to the brim and beyond if we weren’t all on track to die in a relatively small number of years. I regularly stay up way past bedtime to try and squeeze more day out of the day, and more often than not it’s to keep making music! It works but has consequences. There is no solution unfortunately…

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You need to learn to take sleep from any spare time you have available. Naps, power naps etc. You could also look into learning meditation as IME its a good way to recover some enrgy during the day.

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I prefer working on music in the morning if not working because as you said it activates your brain making it hard to sleep… maybe try set a limit of only 1 or 2 hours max And that’s it…
and just really make the most of that time, you might find it more productive having a set time limit

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Our lifespan is quite ok. The problem in life is that we’re working 8 hours a day at a job 90% of us don’t see the point or don’t like (or, even if we can enjoy some aspects of it, we definitely would rather be jaming electronic music with friends all week long). I want to squeeze more day out of the day as well , but that’s because there’s a big hole in my day from 9 to 6.

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That’s what I mean, our lifespans are functionally short because we have to work and sleep. I would really prefer a lifespan of maybe 500 years or something closer to that! The lifespan is ok currently but many years are spent in childhood and then old age, and we work constantly in the years between. It’s really a stupid system but it’s definitely better than nothing. I love to sleep but I wish I could remember more dreams… it might make me more willing to get into bed at a decent hour!

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it’s about the relationship you have with yourself and your body.

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So true

Slowly I change my behavior
Being a psychologist myself, I realize this is more difficult than expected

I work in psychiatry and innovation
This week I have a meeting at Phillips
To create body-measuring system for stress, heart rate, activity, sleep, etc measurement.
My prototype was in excel, it showed me how I burn my body when sleeping for 6 hours only. It made me realize the consequence of my behavior.

First I was not aware and blocked ‘body-feeling’. Now I am aware, I learned to feel my body, now I am learning to change my behavior

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I’m generally good on six hours sleep. For a long time I did jobs with very unsociable hours so I got used to operating at high stress levels on little or no sleep.
Now I work a 9-5 and have a 2 year old who only sleeps through the night if he’s basically on my head throughout. I don’t mind it too much but finding time to make music is difficult as my wife works away a lot and it’s no fun trying to make music through headphones with a sleeping child on your head.
I guess my life would be healthier if I slept more and not making music would definitely create a little space for that. The problem is, if I don’t make music I’ll probably end up shooting people as music seems to be where I put all my anger these days.

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Does your partner work? imo you should work to live, not live to work. I’d always rather pick up less hours career wise and enjoy my life even if it comes with some minor sacrifices but it also depends on the lifestyle you and your family have become accustomed to. I still live a very comfortable life but it just means I can’t go out and spend a grand every time a synth drops. It’s hard to say what you should do given I have no idea of where you live, what you get paid etc but most people can live ok on an average wage without doing full time given they have a partner and don’t live in San Francisco or London etc. There’s a lot of factors involved though.

Ultimately sleep is more important than jamming. Sleep 2 hours extra and live 20 years longer. You just have to prioritise your hobbies, I’d focus more heavily on things you won’t be able to do when you’re older while you can, like hiking if that’s your thing. Buy an iPad and make music on the go

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I wouldnt look at it as unhealthy as then you have a guilt association with it and that shouldn’t be the case. Maybe incorporate korg gadget or similar into a lunch session and then dedicate a fixed amount of time in the evening that gives you time to still get 7 hours sleep. Then think of travel time as critical listening time for your own music and reference material so it’s contributing towards your passion.

Maybe kids the kids would enjoy a manual or two.

Sleep
Sleep tonight
And may your dreams
Be realized
If the thundercloud
Passes rain
So let it rain
Rain down on him
Mmm
So let it be
Mmm
So let it be

Sleep
Sleep tonight
And may your dreams
Be realized
If the thundercloud
Passes rain
So let it rain
Let it rain
Rain on him

_MLK from U2

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I don’t have kids and I also have this struggle.
I envy those with a 4 day work week.

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I had insomnia and saw a doctor and read some books. And now I don’t have insomnia anymore.

While it helps to clear your head before bed, no sugar, stimulation, etc., your body will sleep for how long it needs to sleep.

Numbers like 4, 6, 8, 10, etc. are good goals, but you shouldn’t fixate on them. Your body will sleep for as long as it needs to sleep.

Once I got comfortable with this idea, I didn’t have insomnia anymore. Strange.

But yes, I make music at night and in the morning. I often wake up in the middle of the night going, what if I tried “this” with “that” :crazy_face::crazy_face::crazy_face:

I have two kids, a wife, and a full time job. And I skate and snowboard everyday…lots of stoke

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I don’t like sleep either. Unless I’m waking up, then I’m like “Damn this is good I need more of this.”

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Would that be the 80-100 years or 30-50 years? :wink:

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Do you drink caffeine? I know that if you have a cup in the morning you still have quite a bit of caffeine in your bloodstream during the night.

I’ll take 0-20 again please if that’s an option

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#jamuary2020 hit my sleep schedule hard… I slept less than 2x the total time spent jamming…

But I guess that was how I compromised—super focused for a limited time, knowing it wasn’t sustainable. Then dialing back into better habits once the month was up.

I second the notion that ideally you sleep as long as your body needs. I see the only way to do this is to make music in the morning. Kids go to bed, you go to bed after spending some time with your wife (it is a mistake to let kids sacrifice the relationship with ones spouse). End goal is you are in bed early. This way you can almost always sleep until you wake up naturally. You can do music when you wake up.

Having said this - I know it does not work for me but I endeavor to try. I am usually awake until 2 or 3 am but I know that if I could master getting up early instead it would be a good thing. For me, night hours are hours I am alone and can work. However this could work just the same in the morning when everyone else is still asleep.

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