I remember being a kid and feeling like having the most fun when I had a wide open space to dump all my stuff (Legos, baseball cards, whatever) out onto and begin playing with it.
I felt least joyful when I had all my stuff out and there was no new space to expand or do new things.
I’m exactly the same way today. Cleaning up and putting away is the hardest thing, but it ends up being the most rewarding. Escaping into a vacation without many possessions helps demonstrate this (as written by OP).
I just found this old NYTimes article which sounds similar, except it’s specifically about mental load. I think there are relations here. Perhaps the mental load of having all the gear out/around reduces the innovative/creative possibilities (similar to what others have written above). It’s been said (in one form or another) on this forum a thousand times.
I can’t help but think that some of the shame comes not only from the hoarding capitalistic consumer culture of all this, but also the knowledge that the more complicated something is, the less thrilling, inviting, and creatively rewarding it might be.
Well I’m big into ethical hedonism. The idea is basically this thought: “yeah, I’m hedonistic, but if it doesn’t hurt anyone else, everyone else can fuck off!”. No shame. Lol
And yes, I have a shame-free room full of expensive gear that I use as much as I can
Yeah, but then there’s the scarcity of resources, which actually does hurt everyone else. (Not trying to blame gear hoarders; it’s the same with every newly produced product.)
An old MPC500 that I haven’t really used much in years, but since it’s my first hardware bought for money earned in sweat and tears during summer work at high school I don’t have a heart to sell it.
When I get a new synth, it really has to fill a role that can‘t be filled with what I already have. And I always make a full track (no overdubs allowed) with just that new synth, to justify the purchase to myself.
It‘s not about shame, but to dissolve the awful feeling of having created hole in my purse.
If I play with my gear I feel shame for not playing with my kids, if I play with my kids I feel shame for not playing with my gear. I got a wavestation a few years ago and while I really enjoy the sound I barely touch it since I feel I haven’t had time to learn it properly. For shame!
I’m ITB, but for sure the thought swirls round. I’m essentially in ubertrialmode at the moment, sampling as much as I can after 10 years of not being able to participate. I’m fortunate enough to be able to do it without penalty. Part of the thinks “you really shouldn’t you know.” Another part of me thinks “yeah, but you never could do it, and you can (for now) so to hell with worrying about it.” But I occasionally look at the VST folder and go “hmmmmm.” Swings and roundabouts!
I try to limit myself because i want my hobby to be making music, not buying gear.
A few months ago I sold off the last of my physical gear and only have a push 3 and honestly… i kinda miss all of my old gear haha.
I think there is a point where you have a problem with spending money on gear, and it is great to recognize that and start setting goals to avoid going in deeper.
The nice thing is, music gear holds value better than a lot of other things. So while you are likely taking a loss with a sale, it can be mercifully small.
On the other hand: If you love it, then fuck what everyone thinks. I don’t have a nice car, I manage my money really well, I have invested my entire 20s and 30s into my career and it has massively paid off. If I want some fun machines that go beep boop and i have fun on, then that is my business.
Every time they do some new stupid shit, I think of getting rid of what remaining gear I have by them. I might actually be ashamed to show up with it live for this reason, even though most people have no idea about it… at the very least I would put some sticker over the logo
